Decision Making

Decision Making Need Not be Nerve Wracking

I meet weekly with a group of friends for discussions about all things spiritual. This is not a lightweight group; some of these folks have been advanced spiritual seekers for more than 30 years. We get into some pretty heavy discussions, and it is the highlight of my week.“Decision Making
with Certainty”

During the course of an evening, our discussions often tend to focus upon learning opportunities that some member of the group is encountering, or has recently encountered. This week, the topic of conversation was a decision making dilemma that Martha was facing with her perfect son.

It involved a decision she had to make; it was a very common values based issue that every parent of a teenager would recognize. The actual issue is irrelevant. What is relevant was the anguish that Martha was experiencing over the decision about making choice of course A or course B. Neither choice offered her any peace of mind. Nonetheless, Martha felt compelled to make a choice.

For almost an hour, 8 of us wrangled over what was right and what was wrong. Was this karma, ego nonsense, power struggles, frustrations from her childhood relations with her overbearing mother, or any of a number of other issues?

We were getting nowhere, and most importantly, Martha was even more confused about her decision making than ever. Finally, a lull in conversation occurred and John said, “I think I have an idea that might help”. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a quarter and handed it to Martha. “Heads you take course A and tails you take course B”. Martha was a bit hesitant to leave decision making of such a critical issue to the flip of a coin. John encouraged her to go along with it anyway.

She flipped the coin and it came up heads. She instantly looked up and smiled and said, “Can I make it 2 out of 3?”. The whole group gasped all at once at the sudden realization of what just happened. The fact that she had second thoughts about the outcome of the coin flip shed all kinds of awareness on her doubts about course A. Martha’s intellect was incapable of sorting through the mirad of issues surrounding the decision, but her inner knowing did so in an instant. What was most revealing was the certainty that she now had about her decision.

This was a stunning display of an effective method of tuning into your inner knowing about decision making. I have since used it on myself in several decision making dilemmas, and this method has never failed to surface my true feelings. Try it, when and if you experience doubt about the outcome of the flip, take the opposite choice.

Thank you John!